Friday, March 28, 2014

How to Make Episode 7 Not Suck While Keeping EU Fans Happy

Before you continue reading this, at all, understand two things: 1) I'm guessing as to what Disney will and will not remove from the EU storyline, and 2) there are huge Expanded Universe spoilers in the coming paragraphs. If you have any sort of inclination to read any of the EU, stop reading this now. Like, right now.

Also, any hyperlinked words in this blog are links to Wookieepedia to further explain what those items are. It'll help you give you a little back story if you don't know these characters, places, or situations, or it'll serve as a refresher if you haven't read the Legacy of the Force series in a while.

Also also, there's a podcast episode companion to this which should be up and running shortly.

Now that I have that out of the way, we can set the opening scene. Circa 35ish years after the Return of the Jedi, Coruscant is being rebuilt as well as the rest of the galaxy. The Yuuzhan Vong are acknowledged, along with the war, but there's no actual talk of the turmoil that took place just a few years before. Basically, the Yuuzhan Vong are a species of militant, violent, and brutal humanoids who invaded what we know as the Star Wars galaxy from a whole other galaxy. They wrecked shop for a long time (7 or 8 years, I believe), hunting Jedi like sport. They also turned Coruscant, what we remember being a planet-wide city, into a moss-covered wasteland. You could also completely ignore the Yuuzhan Vong war and pretend that all this galactic battle damage came from decades of the Imperial and Republic/Rebel Alliance war. I know, I know, but we already know Disney is destroying cannon, I'm just guessing as to what's going to make it to the editor's floor. But for the sake of my story, we're sticking with the Yuuzhan Vong.

Our main characters, from the original trilogy still exist, but obviously we are passing the reigns to younger, newer characters/actors. Jacen Solo, Jaina Solo, and Ben Skywalker will be our new protagonists. Anakin Solo exists too, but he won't play a big part until Episode 8, other than to show that he and Ben Skywalker are best friends. All four of them are Jedi Knights or higher, by the way.

Jacen Solo and Tenal Ka, who's also a Jedi, have a love interest that's lasted a while, long enough where they have a daughter together, Allana, who's just a wee one. There's also a very large rift between Jacen and Jaina, who used to be best friends. Born as the twins of Han Solo And Leia Organa, and basically raised by Chewbacca, these two were inseparable for their 25 years of sibling-hood. But during the Vong War, Jacen starting growing apart from Jaina, and living a much more secluded life. Jaina's worried about Jacen's well being, sensing something is drastically wrong with her twin, while Jacen just wants to be left alone to his studies. They are Jedi, after all; they're supposed to do a lot of studying. That being said, Jaina asks her aunt, Luke Skywalker's wife, Mara Jade to secretly look after him.

Without getting too deep into the politics of the Galaxy, which I kind of explain in a bit more detail in the Podcast counterpart of this, the galaxy is rifted into two parts. The Galactic Federation of Free Alliances, which is basically the New-New-Republic, and the Confederation, which is made up of planet systems that were relatively unaffected by the Yuuzhan Vong war (Corellia, Adumar, Bespin, Bothawui, and Commenor. Others eventually joined, also). The Confederation wants to be left to their own devices, while the Federation is counting on help from the Confederation to help rebuild the capital and other demolished worlds. This infighting eventually leads to another civil war. And though you can call me unoriginal for following the plot of the Legacy of the Force series, but seriously, it's an amazing story that already exists. Why not keep this going?

Cal Omas, who runs the Federation government, wants to repair the rift between his people and Thracken Sal-Solo, the man in control of the Confederation government. While he's trying to do this, the Federation military starts arresting Corellian-born Federation citizens against Cal Omas's wishes, stating that they could be government or military spies. Any chance to mend the problems between the Corellians and the Federation goes right out the window with this move. Corran Horn, a high-ranking member of Luke Skywalker's New Jedi order, and Wedge Antilles are among the Corellians who are arrested. The detainment of these two names send the Confederation into a frenzy, and they quickly (and easily) amass a fleet, which they use to attack and mutilate The Federation's largest shipyard. Any prisoners taken from this attack are used as bargaining chips to free the Corellian political prisoners. Corran immediately goes to the Jedi Order and chooses to take sides with the Corellians (without the Order's support), and Wedge is made Grand Admiral of the Corellian fleet.

The destruction of the shipyard immediately causes Cal Omas to flipflop on his stance, making a public announcement condemning the Corellian Confederation and labeling them terrorists. The Corellians mention that their own actions have sparked the interest of the Hutts and the Chiss. As a viewer you don't see the Hutts as important, and you barely (if at all) know who the Chiss are. This is downplayed for a reason. They're really both separate and wholly large civilizations that are anti-New Republic, both of which have wanted a reason to throw a punch for decades. Plus Grand Admiral Thrawn was a Chiss, and though he died 20 years earlier in the current EU storyline, you never know what Disney will and will not consider cannon for this script...

This whole "rebellion" of sorts has the potential to turn into yet another full scale civil war, and Cal Omas, Supreme Admiral Cha Niathal of the Federation Navy, and Jacen Solo all see this. This isn't just a muscle flexing competition anymore. Jacen and Cha have been friends and military counterparts since the Vong war. They both compliment each other as Cha is a strategy mastermind while Jacen has the ability to do what the Jedi call a "Battle Meld". With Jacen's particular battle meld, he has the ability to connect minds with everyone on the battlefield, giving his side an obvious advantage. The problem with this meld is it takes a negative toll on Jacen's well being every time he does it, which he keeps quiet to everyone else. They decide they need to begin reforming their fleets.

In the meantime, Thracken Sal-Solo is in conversations with Tenal Ka, the Queen of the Hapes Consortium, regarding the possible military alliance between the two governments. Tenal Ka talks it over with Jacen, who convinces her that the Corellians are truly nothing more than terrorists. Tenal respectfully declines Thracken's offer, wishing to remain neutral. As soon as this happens, Thracken sides with a group of renegade Hapan nobles in an attempt to overthrow the queen. In order to do this, they carry out an assassination of her and her daughter, which is abruptly foiled by Jacen, who sensed this was happening from the beginning. After he saves her life, Jacen pitches the idea of joining the Federation to the Hapans, which she agrees to because the Corellians just tried to kill her and her daughter. He and Niathal have Tenal Ka schedule a meeting between the Corellian and the Hapan fleets. When the Confederation fleet arrives, they are immediately attacked by not only the Hapans, but the Federation fleet also. Insert 20 minute JJ Abrams style space battle. Please.

It doesn't matter how its done, but the conclusion is the inevitable loss by the Confederation as they retreat and limp away to lick their wounds. The Federation celebrates a victory and a new alliance with the Hapans. After the battle, Jacen finds and kills the Hapan nobles by crushing their necks through the force (or some other type of equally Sideous or Vader-like act). Either way, this causes a disturbance in the force that Mara Jade notices, forcing her to confront Jacen. Jacen admits to the Force battle meld causing him extreme exhaustion, and after every one he needs to retire to his quarters to study and meditate. She doesn't believe him, but leave the conversation to dwell on it. After she leaves, he calls Cha Niathal to tell her that they should have a conversation about their future.

Cut to the ending scenes where Jacen and Supreme Admiral Cha Niathal stand behind Cal Omas as he declares an all out war on the Corellian Confederation. Cut over to a different scene where a random Hutt standing in front of a few uniformed, blue-skinned Chiss and Mandalorians as he talks to a very weary and tired Thracken Sal-Solo, the conversation ending in nods and handshakes. Cut back to Jacen Solo having a conversation with Anakin Solo and Ben Skywalker about how, even though it's not even remotely Jedi-like, Thracken Sal-Solo needs to be assassinated before he does anymore damage, causing Ben and Anakin to exchange worried glances. The final scenes are troops marching, ships flying, and us viewers wondering who's really the bad guy.

After Credits Scene
You can't ignore the fact that since Disney's making these movies there will be an after credit scene. And this is also the perfect chance to tease the next stand-alone film, which will probably be a Boba Fett movie, which will also probably already be in production by the time Episode VII hits the theaters.

Picture this. Relatively deserted cantina door opens, and in strolls Boba Fett in full Mandalorian garb. Without breaking stride or paying attention to the countless curious patrons, he strolls up to a table where a figure hidden by shadows sits, reaches into one of his pouches, and tosses a data card on the table. A blue humanoid hand reaches out of the shadows and takes the data card, saying, "Thank you, Fett. Payment was posted an hour ago." To which Fett replies, "I know, I saw. It was good doing business with you, Admiral." The emphasis on the word Admiral causes the shadowed figure to lean out, revealing a blue-skinned, red-eyed, black haired man who says, "No one has called me Admiral in 20 years..." Fett just subtly shakes his head as he turns to leave, saying, "You can't lie to me. You forget, I know everything. See you soon"

End

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